YOU DON'T DO ANYTHING WRONG, DO YOU? . . .THE TRICK IS JUST DON'T GET CAUGHT.

While working at a place like Disney, it's really kind of hard to get fired. Not showing up for work with out 'Calling in' twice will do it. Too many 'call ins' will also do it. There's a matrix of how many call ins are allowed in a certain alotted time. I can't tell you how many times I've seen people play the game and get burned in the end. For the first nearly five years of my Disney career i had perfect attendance. At that time they offered a $500 bonus for perfect attendence. When I heard that they stopped the bonus. . . I Called in sick the next week.

Damaging property doesn't neccesarily get you fired. Story has it that one of my managers in costuming flipped a pargo (golf cart) yeaars ago. I never got the complete story on how she managed to do that. She probably got a reprimend or two, then it was forgotten about. I had another manager put the pargo in the 'area formally known as the swamp'. She to still works for the company. By the way, 'the swamp' has since been replaced by Lights, Motors, Action Stunt show.

When Disney MGM Studios had a working animation studio, they built them thier own parking garage. They have since left and the building is used for administration. The parking garage gets a work out during the holidays when hourly cast members have to park inside the park, so more guests can park in the lots. At various points in time, fellow cast members would give each other pargo rides to thier cars at the end of thier shift. After arriving at my car, I dared my friend with the pargo to just let it roll down the parking garage to see how fast it would go. He did. I followed with my car and clocked him at 30 to 35 mph. . .I didn't think those little things could take corners that fast.

While at Epic, one of the costuming folks had a huge delemna. Her son had to go to a doctor's appointment, but she knew he wouldn't go unless she took him. However, she couldn't get out of work. We had all worked together for a very long time and tended to watch each other's backs, so we told her to go and we'd cover for her. So she left work (still on the clock) for four hours. The show went on with out a hitch. Our manager came in we told him that she was at Creative costuming picking up repairs. She came in while our manager was there and panicked. I took her to the back, told her everything was fine and just act like you got back from a supply run. She did. He never suspected a thing.

Similarly, one of the dressers did something that started simple enough, but soon turned into a monster: Go get chinese take out for everyone. Two problems, the restuarant was around fifteen miles (45 minutes away) and the number of people ordering kept growing each week. The epic cast,which is a huge cast, started adding thier orders. Soon Hunchback of Notre Dame cast and crew would stop by the stage on thier way to work and drop off their orders too. THe driver always got a free lunch out of it, but the fact that we were off property for nearly two hours could make for a short Disney career.

Don't get me wrong, you are allowed to leave property for your 60 minute lunch break. However, it usually takes much longer to get to your car, drive to a restraunt, order, eat and get back. When you work in shows and miss the 15 minute 'places for show' call, you're toast. Just ask the performer at Beauty and the Beast who was at Taco Bell and completely missed the show. For character integrity sake I won't say which role he played, but lets just say, he was a huge part of the show. They replaced him on the spot. The only thing that saved his job was, while they were in the process of terminating (firing) him, the replacement performer fell off the stage during the next show and was pretty badly injured. So Taco Bell Boy went back to the show, finshed the day AND saved his job.

It's not uncommon to see people sleeping under the clothes line duirng show breaks. It's out of the way, noises are muffled and managers can't find you. . . usually. One day back in the mid-nineties, we had a long time cast member come to work at Epic and she was sick as a dog. She asked to go home, but the manager wouldn't let her. (Why is the subject for a whole other blog). It was at a time when Epic was in the boondocks (the park had since grown and EPic is in smack dab in the middle of everything) and it could be literally weeks or months at a time with out seeing a manager. So we told our co-worker the go to the back of the trailer and sleep it off. In case i failed to mention it, sleeping on the job is another immediately fireable offense too. But in this case the wardrobe person slept most of the entire shift and we coverd for her.

I'm sure making pipe bombs would be considered and immediate fireable offense as well, but on a bored rainy day someone desided to see what would happen if they put dry ice in a hard plastic Evian bottle. Let's just say, it crackled, and clouded up, and crackled more. The master builder got a bit nervous over what he had done and desided to kick it inside the building. Thank God it didn't make it that far, since inside the break room was wall to wall mirrors and I know the precussion that followed would have shattered them all. Any way, in the process if kicking the bottle up the ramp, it got wedged under the dry ice bin. It exploded with such force that I know half the park heard it and most people I talked with thougth it was pyro from Epic. Hard pieces of plastic shrapnel went everywhere and not a single part of the bottle was reconizable. Needless to say a lesson was learned and I believe we all probably needed new underwear afterwards too.