I LOVE A PARADE !!! . . . sort of

Disney loves parades. Even when it's not called 'A Parade' in a park that, it was said, was not designed for A Parade, they still have . . . A Parade, or in Animal Kingdom's case The March of the Artimals. But then, they also tried to convince us that it wasn't a Zoo either. Who can forget the "Nahtazu" commercials which ran until 2006. I guess when you're AZA accredited, you have to admit that you ARE a zoo.


The March of the Artimals was one bizzar parade. Filled with neon colored characters and very odd floats, it pushed the limits of what a parade could do. One float that was paticularly wierd had large honeycomb and a queen bee that was laughing hysterically. I was told that the story behind it was that she had drank so much honey that she was drunk. If that's true or not, i'd love to hear from anyone who knows for sure. They had some very cool stilt walkers in this parade. and even after the parade was closed the Bird Stiltwalkers appeared around property for a while. The costume looked like it was person riding a tall bird. The puppeteer/stiltwalkers were so skilled at manipulating it, that you truly believed it was alive.


After the Artimals danced of into the sunset in June of 1999, It was replaced with Mickey's Jammin' Jungle Parade in October of 2001. This one gets spruced up for the holidays and they change the name to Mickey's Jingle Jungle Parade. Both are pretty much the same thing, just with christmas decorations on the floats and Christmassy costumes. Still heavy on the artsy side, this one centers on the core Disney characters, so I'm sure this version will be around for a while.


Epcot has had only one parade over all these years. Tapestry of Nations was created for the new millenium celebrations which ran from 1999 to 2001. It was later tweeked a bit, given a new name 'Tapestry of Dreams' and was extended until 2003. It too was very artistic with giant puppets and huge drum floats. In the millenium version, the parade lead off with a Sage of Time stiltwalking character. For the Tapestry of Dreams the Dreamseekers started the parade and the wishes of children where heard through out the soundtrack . Epcot is a hard place to have a parade. Making it around the the world showcase means there's a lot of ground to cover. Instead, they broke it up into multiple units entering the park at the same time.

The studios has had the widest variety of parades, motorcades and other moving shows. Way back in the beginning there was the Dinosaurs parade (1992) based on the Television show. (You may remember that the baby dinosaur's catch phrase was "not the mama!" ) It was the only time that I've heard of the float driver wrecking the the float. In the driver's defense, he did have to take a very tight corner, but this time he missed and hit a chain link fence. Fortunately no body was seriously hurt, but there were a few people who where on the float that got knocked a around a bit. Most of the Studio's parades have a scantily clad dance troupe . . . the Dino parade had the Dino-girls. Short shorts. Tenee tiny feather and leather tops. Nothing in the middle. I guess you have to have something for the dirty ole' men :)


Running from December 1992 until August 1995, Aladdin's Royal Caravan followed the short ran Dino parade complete with their Dirty Ole' Men unit. . . I mean Harem Girls. I find it amusing to see how things are recycled and 'repurposed' over the years. The double decker float from the Dino parade later became a moving street market float for the Aladdin Parade. The spitting camels in the Aladdin parade lived outside of the Soundstage Restaurant for a while, but are now set pieces beside the Aladdin flying carpet ride at Magic Kingdom. The Genie balloon float, swordmen's costumes and the harem girls would live on in Magic Kingdom's ' Remember the Magic' parade long after the Royal Caravan had left the Studios.

The Aladdin parade was a bear to work. There were inflatable costumes that we had to load and unload from a 16' box truck, batteries that liked to 'meltdown' in the middle of the parade, large troupes of street dancers AND we had to walk the parade. Two to three costumers had to walk with the inflatables . . . juuust in case they deflated we could help the performer off stage and out of costume. We even had to wear costumes and Fez's that cosmotology had to bobby pin in place. To dress and undress the inflatable acrobats, we had to climb on a 4 foot +or- platform in order to reach them. A good friend of mine was running late one day and ran to climb on the dressing platform and missed it. She said she ended up underneath it. She was okay. Just a bit dazed.


Management will always, always , always try to get as much of the show out as possible. Whether it be short staffed, weather or technical diffuculties. . . The Show Must Go On. During Aladdin parade Jasmine and Aladdin rode on top of a huge elephant float which required the use of a fork lift for them to get up there. This is Florida. Mother nature loves thunderstorms. Aladdin and Jasmine were in place. The fork lift was put up. . . Let's just say, they did not beat the incoming thunderstorm and the two characters where absolutely soaked by the time they were rescued from the float. Aladdin's costume includes a purple feather in his turban. After the storm, his entire costume had streaks of purple from where the colors had ran. Soon there after, we had a white, in case of rain, feather.

Disney had gotten a lot of mileage from the Toy Story characters. After the original movie was released, there was a Toy Story parade at the studios which ran from 1995 to 1997. Buzz, Woody and the gang have been all over the place ever since. Buzz even went to the International Space Station for a while as part of a children's educational program. After Hercules replaced Toy Story as THE day parade, they started sending out a mini unit with a troop of green army men, Buzz and Woody in a converted micro van. I believe, in a previous life, it was the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles van.

Speaking of special events and mini parades, the Studios has had motorcades for everything imaginable. Star Wars weekends motorcade was a mini parade of cars, movie stars and Star Wars characters, except fan club weekend. When the 501 legion was in the house with thier costumes, we had one Huge parade with a sea of Storm Troopers leading it off.

Super Soap Weekends, and it's testoserone cousin ESPN weekends, each have motorcades with thier idols riding in covertibles. For a true fish out of water type experience look no further than the Home Improvement Father's day parade on june 15,1997. Tim Allen's Home Improvement show was a huge success, so Disney capitolized on it. They pulled every type of machine they had at thier disposal out of the wood work and put them in this parade. Horticulture and Engineering folks, who have never been on stage before, were now the STARS. Forklifts, Bush hog mowers, industrial mowers, backhoes, earth movers, a monster truck or two. . . the list goes on. All of the Disney owned items were washed up and a Binford label was put on it some where. Even today, you may see an item or two here and there that still has the Binford name on it if you look for them.

When Hercules movie came out, so did a new parade. The Hercules Zero to Hero parade, however, it had a farely short run (1997-1998) because the Mulan parade was hot on it's heels. With Mulan, it was back to the forklifts again. This time it was costuming that had to ride the fork lift we could reach the extremely tall Elder's floats. The mulan parade had a chinese dragon that was in a shape of the Great Wall of China. EVERY body who ever worked the parade haaated that thing. If the people infront of you didn't do thier job right, extra weight was thrown onto the people behind them, and yes people did hurt thier backs because of it. When the parade closed, the parade maintenance people allowed the cast to 'tear up' Great Wall. Needless to say, there are many little souvenier pieces created that day.

What I missed the most about the Mulan parade was the beautiful Perchuran Horses. Every day we had four horses pulling the Mulan and Shang float. The day we closed the parade, Shang asked the horse handlers if he could sit on one of the horses. They let him. They used to live at Fort Wilderness Campground, but I'm not sure if the company even has the Perchurans any more or not. I also missed seeing the Chinese acrobats from the China pavillion from Epcot every day as well. For some of our cast, it was thier daily Chinese lesson. When the parade ended, I guess it was 'class dismissed'.

As of 2010, the longest running parade at the studios is the Disney Stars and Motorcars. From Oct of 2001 to March of 2008, it debuted as park of Walt's 100 years celebration. With the stars and cars parade, Disney broke the long time tradition. . . habit. . . custom of opening a new show and or parade with ever new movie release. Cars and stars parade was an 'evergreen' parade. Just swap out cars and you cover the new movie which is what they did when Monster's Inc came out. Hercules car was replaced with Mike and Sully. During the holidays one year, the parks were packed and they wanted to make the parade route longer to allow more people to see it. So they started at the end of New York Street. The christmas lights were up for Spectical of Lights, or at least they WERE, until the Mary Poppins car (the one with bert and mary riding the carousel horses) caught a string of lights with the top of the carousel pole and ripped an entire section down. I don't remember them taking the parade down New York street again after that.

A Note From The Rumor Mill: Durning the run of Stars and Cars Parade, it has been said that Aladdin wanted to give his significant other something extra special for the holidays. So he went to the parade barn late one night to take pictures with the Aladdin car. Let's just say if the rumor holds true it was him, the car and a turban in the pictures. . . . .

When the modified convertibles for the stars and cars parade arrived, our parade maintenance people were also taking delivery of the Animal Kingdom's Mickey's Jammin' Jungle parade vehicles as well. Behind Star tours there is a dip between perimeter road and the little parking area. Maintenance decided to use this dip to gently back one of the DAK float vehicles off of the flat delivery truck. Long story short. . . they miscalculated. When I was coming back from running errands i saw a large flatbed truck, ramp down, bed tilted up and parade float vehicle sitting with it's back bumper on the asphalt and the front bumper on the truck bed. THe wheels where barely touching anything. Basically, it was stuck.

AHH the good ole'days.

p.s. after some further research, i'll blog about MK's parade history.

WE ARE THE (SMALL) WORLD. . . .

It's January 23, 2010, a week and a half ago our little corner of the world was changed forever when the tiny country of Haiti was rocked with one of the deadliest Earthquakes in history. True, Florida is several hundred miles from the island, but being the closest state to the island nation, we became the point of entry for refugees and ex-patriated Americans wanting to return home.

When I worked in costuming, there were large numbers of white anglo-saxon Americans and Hispanic Americans in my department. Spanish, Span-glish, English all became common place at work. However, when I started working at the resorts, I found myself swimming in a mix of spanish, vietnamese and Haitian Creole. I remember walking into the cast building of All Star resort and wondering ' When did I just leave the country?' Working around so many hispanic people, you start to pick up bits and pieces of the language. Although I have tried to learn a second language, i discovered that i just don't have the language gene. However, listening to the Haitian housekeepers, I keep asking myself, is that even a word?

Language barriers or not, once we heard about the earthquake, our thoughts immediately went to the Houskeeping staff, which at most resorts is heavily Haitian and Vietnamese. Disney had made it known that they are stepping up to help the haitian cast members any way it could. They made a substantial donation to Red Cross almost immediately. There was a Help Haiti Now telethon on January 21, 20010 and nearly 400 cast members volunteered their time to man the phones room taking donations. Even the little things say alot, like having a bake sale in the cast cafeteria with all of the money raised going to the Red Cross. In the cast hallway, there is a bulletin board dedicated to cultural diversity issues. I was walking out today and someone had put up several pages of Haiti facts and figures.

Diversity. It's a funny word. Basically it means to acccept and respect each others differences. That's a great concept, except when it's used to exclude the majority. Let me explain. In the character costuming building we had a manager from Puerto Rico. We had many of the hourlies from hispanic countries or Miami, BUT not everyone spoke Spanish. That didn't matter. Our manager (I use this term loosely) did an entire shift meeting in spanish AND never translated what he said to the non-spanish speakers. They were pissed. As I would always say, Diversity goes both ways. I will respect you, if you respect me; that, however, rarely seemed to happen.
(By the way, that manager got laid off in the 2009 management layoffs. Hmmm, karma.)

Before I wrote this week's blog, i was trying to think of a country that's not represented somewhere at Disney. I honestly can't think of any. Before I left costuming, Epic (Indiana Jones show) has three guys who spoke Russian. (2 bulgarian and 1 Russia). We had a tumbler from spain by way of peru. If you think Africa isn't represented, Wrong. Animal Kingdom Lodge has several people from various African countries working in various jobs. When I was there they had a door greeter from Niarobi (I think) and several others that entertained the kids with storytime and African music time.

Most of them are on temporary work visas like the ICP's (International College Program). ICP's come over to work for pretty cheap wages, pay high rent in Disney apartments and then leave a few months later before they have a chance to get jaded and bitter. When you think of Epcot's World Showcase, think ICP's or temporary work visa's. Although, I'm not so sure about Canada and Mexico. They could probably fudge a little there and no one would notice. So China has been sending people over for years to work in the China Pavillion. However, once Hong Kong Disney opened and the talk of a Bejing Disney maybe in the works, there has been a huge wave of chinese ICP's coming through the college progam.

When you see wave after wave of fresh off the bus internationals, it would be easy to start generalizing cultures. In the first bunch of ICP's of 2010, the ones from China seemed so timid and shy. I kept thinking 'and the warrior Genghis Kahn is your ancestor?' Australia and England ICP's are pretty much "Hey, how are ya doing. . . where's the party?" American college program kids are more like "Hey, the party's at my place. . . bring the keg!" (Nothing personal meant, it's just honest observations). In 2009 we had two Chinese ICP's kill a duck at the apartment complex. Thier intentions where to eat it; instead, they were sent home immediately.

When you talk about Diversity in a work force, you can't forget politics. During the Bush Administration, one of my cast members at Epic was a staunch Republican. He worshipped the ground Bush walked on and always hated it when I pointed out the president's flaws and misdeeds. After the Iraq war started, I ask 'D', "What is YOUR President doing now ?" Sometimes, he'd just hang his head and walk away.

And what conversation about Diversity would be complete with out mentioning religion. Again at Epic, one of the tumblers is Moroccan Muslim. I am a Southern Baptist. We would start talking about religion and the break room would clear out. I was always fine with agreeing to disagree and move on. My Muslim friend, however, would tend to get a bit fired up at times. Before I tranfered he offered to give a copy of the Qur'an. I accepted it and told him i'd read it, but that was as far as it would go. . . .Finally, We agreed to disagree.

It's all good

BBRRRrrrrrrrr. . . . 27 DEGREES ARE YOU KIDDING ME !!!

Now that my fingers have thawed out some, I can write mt first blog of the new decade. Wahoo !! The year 2010 came in like a lion with several days of low and mid twenties temperatures. I always have guests telling me, " This is Florida, you people don't know what cold it." WELL, when we are colder than Colorado the first week of January. . . Who's laughing now ?

We had a family with three kids who were dieing to go into the hot tub. They were gone maybe twenty-thirty minutes when i looked out the window and saw three little kids wrapped up head to toe leaving the hot tub. I guess it was a case of 'We came.We saw. We conquered. . . Now let's get back in side.

THe life guards are loving it. When the air is too cold to open the pool, they come inside and play games like Jenga (with giant Jenga blocks), chutes and ladders, ect with the kids. Not a bad gig . . . if you don't mind freezing your tail off when it's juuuust barely warm enough to have the pool open, but no one in their right minds would dare to go in the water.

Speaking of freezing your tail off. We had THE Disney Marathon on January 10th and 11th. And yes it snowed in Florida. Well, more like sleet and rain by the time it reached Disney. I was coming into on Saturday (during the half marathon) and saw the large mass of people running through Magic Kingdom parking lot. Actually, running isn't quite what was happening. It was more like walking briskly while huddled under panchos and silver heat wraps.

For the full marathon on Sunday, it was 27 degrees at the start. I had a guest from Detroit who said she had ran ten marathons in her day. She chose to do the Disney one because it was in Florida and she thought any where would be warmer than Michgan in January. Wrong. She told me that the 2010 Disney Marathon in Florida (of all places) was the coldest one she has ever ran. I was told that at the water stations, they had to squish the cups around to break up the ice in them.

Another event that always seems to have frigid cold weather is the Cheerleader competion. It could be the balmy-est tropical winter on record, but the day before Varsity Cheerleaders move in, the temperatures will drop like a rock.

"If it's cold out, it must be cheerleader season."

I always felt kind of sorry for the kids in the short cheerleader skirts huddled the space heaters waiting to go on stage, until I worked at All Star Resort and was having to field all of the complaints from other guests about the cheerleaders running amuck at the resort.

As far as the rest of the property, very little will ever actually close a park due to the cold. Pretty much just Hurricanes affect theme parks as a whole. The water parks are another story. So far as of January 12th 2010, the water parks have been closed about as much as they have been open for the year. People ask if they water's heated. . . Yes, but you do eventually have to get out. At which point you will freeze your hieny off.

I know that Indiana Jones Show will shut down if the the temperature gets below 42 ( I think). At extreme cold temps, the hydraulics in the set pieces will begin to freeze up. The characters love the cold. Your dog gets frisky in the cold weather, so do the Disney characters. . . except Jasmine and Ariel and a few other scantily clad folks. But sent Darth out with his black on black on black ensemble and he's ready to take over the Universe !!!

A NEW MILLENIUM AND OLD DECADE

As I sit here on the edge of a new decade, it seems like it only yesterday that we were freaking out about Y2K. Ten years have passed and we're still here. The sky hasn't fallen and Florida hasn't fell into the sea. . . not yet anyway.

In the months leading up to Y2K, Disney took all of the computer crashing, power outages and general mayhem predictions to heart. This time 12/30/99, there were crews moving gas generators to every traffic intersection. THe contingency to the contingency plans were being distributed . . . practically in book form. (You think I kidding, I am not). In contrast, I also worked at Universal Studios as an Entertainment Tech, I got to work on December 31 and was handed one sheet of paper. That was it. In a nutshell, Universal's plan was 1) shut down all the rides ten minutes till midnight. 2) If all hell doesn't break loose, restart the rides ten minutes after midnight.

In the first years of the new millenium brought a new CEO to the Walt Disney Company as Micheal Eisner stepped down, it was more like being pushed off the mountian. After years of lack luster job performance and multi-million dollar bonuses, the share holders, spearheaded by Roy E Disney, finally had enough and gave Eisner a vote of no confidence. . . basically, he was fired. Bob Iger steps in and take over the reins.

In 2001, 911 brought huge changes to the world of mouse. There had been a trend of scaling back security guards to save money. Some posts were eliminated. For a while, they tested a non-human security gate for cast entrances we refered to as the cheese shredder. Slide your ID through a code reader and the metal gates turn to let you in. It was a fifty chance that it'd work right. Fortunately there was living breathing person in a security 'cube' who could override the the gate. I'll admit, i actually forgot my ID one day and my Universal ID looked enough like the Disney one that he let me in.

After 911, all of that changed. Guest's bags started being checked. They replaced the security kiosks entering the back gates of the parks with what I call the 'Fort Knox style Security" gates. It consists of two lift gates and a massive pop up, stop you in your tracks if you try anything suspicious, solid steel gate/ barrier thing. I've also seen canine units added to the Disney patrol force. After 911 they actually had bomb dogs checking out each and every car entering the park's back gate. I remember doing my morning runs and driving past our version of 'Check point Charlie'. On various mornings I'd stop to watch for a while. At one point they even had a dog house out there for the bomb dog which I thought was kind of cute. It was at that moment I decided that if all hell was to break out in my country, i needed to be apart of the solution and not sit on the sidelines, so I joined the American Red Cross. And I've been doing that ever since.

The morning of 911, I was a coordinator for Epic (Indiana Jones) and I was supposed to have costume fittings all day. But As I sat in the greenroom with my cast and watched as the second plane hit the towers, costumes weren't important anymore. The cast went out and did one show that day, then they pretty much mutinied after that. Several of the guys said, " I refuse to go out and do a show where we shoot at people and blow things up when i just watched several thousand people die in a plane crash. Early after noon the decision was made to close all parks immediately. Everyone had gone home, except for one pocket of wardrobe people at Streetmosphere or Fantasmic! (I forget which one it was). My costuming managers forgot about them and never told them to go home. Security was pissed and so was the costumers. Gotta love a management team that forgets about thier cast. . . but more on that in another blog. :)

In 2002, Disney bought the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers from Saban Entertainment and soon there after they appeared at the Disney MGM Studios.

On Febuary 1, 2003 came another stop you in your footsteps disaster. Again I was doing my morning runs and kept waiting for the sonic booms from the Space Shuttle Columbia landing. It never came. It never came. I finally found a TV and heard the classic line 'Houston we have a problem." As i tried to do my work that day, I found every break room on property just so I could get snippets of news.

In 2004, after much on and off negotiations with the Henson Company, the stable of Muppet characters was bought by Disney. THe 3D Muppet movie at the studios has been in the park for years, but now Kermit, Miss Piggy and others have a perminate home with the Mouse.

The ecomonic recession has given Disney something to groan about. The last couple years in this first decade, Disney has had to resort to basically 'giving away the farm' to keep the cash strapped population coming back for more. Buy four nights at a resort get three nights free, free on your birthday and gift cards ranging from $200 to $750 (which just started for 2010), it'll be interesting to see what the reservations people can dream up next.

Hong Kong Disney opens in 2005 and from that point on, a large number of our college program kids (temporary employees Disney hires to work in the parks while they get a meager paycheck and college intership credits). We've had college program people for years, but the International College Program, or ICP's, add interesting cultural and language barriers. In 2009 we had a couple ICP's from asia that chased down and killed a duck out side of their Disney owned apartment complex. They had planned to eat it, but where immediately sent home instead.

I have found that we spend a lot of trying to de-confuse people about what things and places are called, but who can blame them in just this last year alone we've changed names of parks, closed islands, openned timeshares and other such mayhem. MGM Studios is now Disney Hollywood Studios. EPCOT is simply Epcot. Pleasure Island is no more, but the marquee and street signs for it still exist. THe Disney Institute ceased to exist as a 'place' in 2000, but the concept of professional buisness training continues as a branch of Disney University. Although the Institute as a resort has been plowed under, the core buildings and Spa live on as a timeshare. . . I mean Disney Vacation Club's Saratoga Springs.

As far as the cast members are concerned, 2009 nine should be called 'the Year of OSHA'. The monorail accident that took the life of the driver was not the first monorail wreck, but it was the first fatal one. In fact I had a costuming manager who had an 11x14 picture of the monorail car that he wrecked years before. They where shooting a promotional video, a piece of equipment was too close to the track and he hit it. The accident of 2009, i don't know all of the details other than there was a track switching problem and that Disney was fined $44,000 (according to the evening news).

Soon after that an actor who I have had the pleasure of working with was leaving the Pirates Tutorial show at Magic kingdom and either fell, slipped or tripped. He hit a backstage wall and broke his neck. He was in the hospital and doing okay on that Thursday. On Monday he went in for surgery and never survuved. Indiana Jones Show had it's first death in 2009 as well. It's amost hard to believe that a tumbler could break his neck from doing a dive over. I guess that goes to show you, that when your number is up. . . you can't just take a rain check.

On a much lighter note, 2009 was filled with anticipation as we all waited for the Harry Potter Wizardy World to open. Yes I know, that's at Universal, but thier expansion made Disney kick it into gear and in the last quarter of the year they announced the largest expansion of Magic Kingdom's history with the revamping of Fantasyland.

As I sit at home and anticipate my neighbor's fireworks that will soon keep me up all night :), I am reminded of an older gentleman who I used to work with. He decided he would be nice and bring in a bottle of champagne to toast in the new year. We stood in the backstage area of Fanstasmic! to watch Epcot's and the Studio's fireworks. . . basically fireworks in stereo.
We tried to explain to him that we were not able to drink champagne on the clock. He kept saying, "but it's New Year's" and we kept saying, " you can be fired for that." We never could get him to understand.

On December 16, 2009, we lost one of our staunchest advocates and leaders. Roy E. Disney, Walt's Nephew, passed away to cancer. He was the driving force behind getting Micheal Eisner into the CEO's seat and an even bigger force in getting him out of it over a decade later. Once Micheal became more concerned with bonuses and stock deals, he seemed to loose the MAGIC or Pixie Dust, if you will. Just knowing that there was still a 'Disney' some where in the Executive offices was comforting. . . now, we just have to hope for the best and pray for better.

As we bid a not so fond farewell to 2009, let us tip our champagne (unless you are on the clock, then it's sparkling grape juice) glasses to the fireworks blasting over the Magic Kingdom and say PLEASE LET 2010 BE BETTER THAN 2009. !!!!

MEMORABLE GUESTS I HAVE KNOWN

At Disney, you will see anything from a Pixie dusted princesses and their equally glitter covered fathers to kids on leashes and squeaky shoed toddlers. Some of the most memorable moments have came out of the innocence of a child. I was working on the concierge floor and a little boy and his father came to the desk. The young one's father said, " go ahead and ask them." He spoke so softly that we could barely hear him. He asked for some 'colored cheerios'. . . froot loops. So we got him a cup of 'colored cheerios' and a carton of milk.

Back in the mid nineties, I was at Epic (Indiana Jones) on a slow day. On my side of the stage, a family sat about half way down in the theater. The rest of that side was empty. The two young kids were all the way down front and watched the show in amazement. . . until the fire went off and they ran back to their parents. As scene two progressed they slowly crept back down to the front row. At the end of the scene, a truck blew up, they retreated again, but quickly returned to the front row after the fire was out. During scene three, where Indy fights the mechanic, these kids were like a yo-yo running back and forth to their parents. . . . until the plane blew up. They booked it back to their parents and jumped into their laps. The parents and I were busting out laughing.

During the Christmas holidays, they shoot fake snow off of the building in the studios and on main street in magic kingdom. I worked an extra hours a shift at the Spectacle of Lights and had to keep warning the kids to 'Not Eat the Florida Snow'. . . Fake snow in Florida equals soap foam. Yyuk !!

The lobby of the Wilderness Lodge has two totem poles, except one young child called them 'potem toles' . . . gotta love kids.

At the Wilderness Lodge, we had a guest who wanted directions to the health club then decided it was too far to walk. True story.

I can't not tell you how many times the hockey puck from the arcade air hockey game has disappeared. CAN ANY ONE TELL ME WHY? What's so fascinating about a hockey puck?

A guest was checking in and asked if the bathtub had 'don't fall down bars'. I wonder if the American Disabilities Act people ever thought of calling the handicap accessible hardware a fun name like that :)

During 2009, guests got into the park for free on their Birthday. A guest asked about the offer, I told him that he could go the guest relation window at any of the parks to get the free admission. He said, "That's okay, I'll just buy a ticket." I wanted to say- Seriously? and do you routinely throw away nearly $80- but instead, I convinced him to not waste his money buying a free ticket.

When I was still in college (had to have been 1992ish) Orlando had a Navy Base. Several of the Navy guys went to my church. I took a couple of the guys to Magic Kingdom one day. Thinking back on it, with a breakfast of Oatmeal Creme pies, I'm not surprised at what happened next. We got to the park and made as far as the Tea Cups. Both guys laid down a challenge and decided to sit this ride out. The one guy said, 'I'm in the Navy. I have a cast iron stomach. No TEA CUP carnival ride is going to affect me.' The famous last words. They got the tea cup spinning even before the ride started and they managed to get that thing going so fast, they were just a blur for most of the ride. I have never seen someone literally green, but one of these 'Navy, I have a cast iron stomach' guys crawled off of the ride, made it as far the nearest bench and laid down until we found him some real food.

While I was working an extra hours shift at the studios during a jump rope competition. . .yes, I said jump rope competition. At the end the of the day, I was walking across the park and a small group of the competitors was behind me talking.
One said," Some asked if I was chearleader, I said, do I look like a chearleader?"
I wanted so back to turn around and say, "Why yes, yes you do." But I behaved and kept on walking.

While at Boardwalk, one of my fellow front desk cashiers accidentally dropped a guest's driver's license behind the computer. We tried to get it, but couldn't reach it. The guest eagerly offered to crawl under the counter to get it. Come to find out, the guest was actually a cast member in some corporate office in the lost prevention department. Along with his id, he also found numerous ink pens, note pads and tons of other office supplies. He told us that he had always wanted to do that. . . What ever floats your boat, I guess.

In the lobby at the Wilderness Lodge for Christmas, there's a scene set up with Christmas decoration bears and a little bench so guests can get a nice Christmas photo in front of the indoor fountain. In 2008 there was a little bit of a water leak from the floor above. . . Okay, it was a water fall that splashed everywhere. We dried everything off to keep the decorations from getting damaged while engineering worked on the problem, put up wet floor signs, and laid towels out on the bench and on the floor. You would think everyone would understand: it is wet, stay back. Oh no, not so fast. Time after time, we'd see people getting hit by the accidental waterfall. Some were even getting mad. You just can't make somethings idiot proof, because idiots are too ingenious.

When I play the parks, I seek get revenge on the idiots. Let me explain. When you go to a theater and the cast member said "Please move down filling in each and every available seat," they mean MOVE and keep moving. SO, if I have to pass by those individuals who refuse to move, I make sure and step on each and every foot. I was on the Disney cruise and a fellow guest was giving the breakfast omelet chef grief. As the #$%^ moved on, I told the chef that I'd trip her out on the island if he'd like. He just smiled and I never saw her again. . . darn.

My cousin and I went to Animal Kingdom in 2008. Because of a medical issue, I needed to rent a scooter to get around. I loved the scooter, it was the other guests that were getting on my nerves. My cousin's grandson was trying to see some animals in an exhibit and this couple pretty much pushed him out of the way, so I kept edging the scooter up to right behind them. I never touched them, but eventually they got the idea and moved on. While we were waiting for the parade, we were getting crowded out by another obnoxious guest. He was literally leaning over top of me. Finally, I reached around the back of the scooter and rested my arm on this guy's belly bag just to get him to back up. Even with that, he hovered over top of me.

Stupid Human actions are not limited to Disney. Off the coast of Florida, a cruise ship guest got into an argument with his wife. At one point he said, "I'll just jump overboard then."
She said," Fine, do it."
So he did.
The Disney ship was close behind and was able to find the missing guest and drug him to safety.
The newscasters that night said," he was okay, but was taken to the hospital to be checked out. . . and maybe a little anger management classes."

But then when you come to think about it, we have a lot of guests who could use anger management classes. . . But more on that later

MEANDERING THOUGHTS FROM A WANDERING MIND, PART DOS

Funny how, as i gather snippets of nothingness for this blog, i noticed that i did my first 'Meanderings' a year ago (almost to the day). Since i started writing, i found that i was coming up with tidbits of behind the scenes happenings that didn't really go with anything else. So. . . .


Back in the day, each of the cash handling locations had a version of a mini bank, complete with bullet proof glass and bank style vaults. Then in the early 2000's the cash control folks were slowly replaced with machines. . . cranky, tempermental, money eating machines. ANYWAY, the older resorts still have survelince cameras and other little known, but still working safety features. My manager, bless his soul, had no idea what the little white button in the money room was for, so he pushed it. . . several times. Nothing happened, so he left. In walks an unsuspecting cast member to count her bank and she is over run by security. Come to find out the little white button was and irreversable security alert. Lesson learned, if you don't know what it is, don't push it.

The quickest way to get someone's attention is to make them think there is some juicy gossip to be had. I was working on a story one day on my lunch break and didn't know how to spell 'conniving'. I called the main building thinking, that if anyone had a dictionary, they would. They didn't. So I hung up the phone. Two seconds later, the phone rings and someone answered my question. Her next comment was "Who ya writing about ???" I hated to dissappoint her, but it wasn't a co-worker.

Disney is all about story telling. One of our entertainment tech leads could make a story out of any thing. For JM (won't use real names to protect the innocent. . .) every thing included a story. There was no such thing as " Hey I have a quick question for you." In fact it was said, if you Asked JM about one plus one equals two. . . he'd start talking about the theroy of TWO.

I have yet to go check it out, but i have been told that in the Muppets 3D movie at the studios, the imagineers were playing around. If you look at the ceiling you will see 'a net full of jello' (work with me here, and say it all together) . . . Annette Funacello. If your still lost, your home work assignment is to go home and watch all of the original Mickey Mouse Club episodes.

During the run of the Aladdin parade, for one of the anniversaries the stage managers got us a cake shaped like Genie. Bright BLUE Genie cake and as we all know yellow and blue make green. No one wanted to admit it out loud, but the next day I kept hearing whisperings in the corners of the greenroom "What color was your poop?" I can answer that, it was green, neon green. Amusing ? . . . Now, but it was a bit disturbing at the time.

I had a guest come the the desk and wanted to let us know that there was no longer a service animal in thier room. Apparently her father stormed out of the resort and took his dog with him. "It was nothing we had done," she said. "He has anger management issues." What I found amusing was the 'service animal' was supposed to help with his anger issues. I'm thinking the dog didn't work very well.

Speaking of service animals, one of the techs told me he was cutting through the backstage area and there was a group of special needs kids with a variety of service animals. . . including a horse. We see a bit of everything working for the mouse, but a service horse kind of caught him off guard.

The actress Betty White came to the studios in the nineties on a book signing stop with a friend of hers. He was blind and the book 'Dina's Story' was about his first seeing eye dog. After their meet and greet with the guests, she offered to spend a little time back stage taking with us. Belle and Beast, who were doing a meet and greet with some guests, were coming back to the green room at this time as well. The gentleman's new seeing eye dog saw Beast. It's hair bristled up. We thought "Oh no." Beast slowly approached and sat on the steps, so he wouldn't freak out the dog. This dog totally forgot about it's master. It ran to Beast and curled up in his lap and just melted. We were all speachless, including Betty who said she had never seen the dog react like that. It was truly a priceless moment.

On a lighter note, we had guests check into a room with a baby monkey. We didn't know about it, but the house keepers sure found out about it. Disney resorts have a strict no animals policy (except of course service animals). They were asked to leave or take the monkey to the kennel. They left. On our dry erase board in the back office, someone drew a picture of a monkey holding a sign 'No Monkeys Allowed'. Over the course of the next several days it was changed to 'No Elephants Allowed' and a few other animals. Yes we amuse ourselves in the most childish ways at times.

Every year we are given Cast Christmas gifts. It's a gift. You take it and move on. In years past they have been decent little memorbilia items. Picture frames. Laser cut paper weights. Pin sets. Well in 2008. . .we got a little hanging thing with a plastic 'Celebrate' sign and a small tin bell. They said it was a wind chime. . .ooookay. Needless to say we all looked at it and said "What the-". Most of them in my area ended up being hung from the ceiling tiles in the back office. Nothing Says Your Important than plastic and tin.

DISNEY AND WASHINGTON D.C.

It's always been interesting to me how well connected the Disney Corporation is with the government. Way back in the 1940's, when Walt's animation career was cranking right along, the government asked him to make war propaganda films to help combat WWII. As the red-blooded American that he was, he made a series of anti-german and anti-japanese film like Der Fueher's Face - 1942 / Education for Death - 1943 / Comando Duck - 1944. . . you know, your typical light and fluffy Walt Disney fare. (I'm thinking none of those ever showed in Tokyo Disneyland) He also approached by the military to make instructional films for the troops. Though the Navy was the first, soon the Army, Air Force, Department of Agriculture and Department of Treasury all wanted to tap into Walt's creativity. For the Treasury, in 1942 and 1943, Walt made films that encouraged Americans to pay thier taxes to help the war effort and published a book to teach children about purchasing War Savings stamps.

Jump ahead a couple decades and in the nineteen sixties, when Walt was amassing huge chunks of FLorida swamp land and citrus groves for what would later become Walt Disney World, Orange county Florida pretty much gave the company free reign. Reedy Creek improvement district was created as a special government agency by the state legislature in order to lure Walt to the state. It regulates building codes and can even levy taxes. Guess who the largest tax payer is. . . .. A little side trivia note. The Swan and Dolphin hotels are the second largest tax payers. Don't get me wrong, now a days, the Reedy Creek fire marshalls patrol every inch of the property and I've heard of areas that get busted for breaking the rules. They also provide emergency services for the entire property.

After a relatively short run as The Disney Golf Resort which later turned into the Disney Inn in 1986, the facility was renamed again. Shades of Green (1994) was leased by the government as a military only resort. In 1996, Uncle Sam bought it outright and it became a retreat for US military personel only. Since then, on many occasions i've seen see military helicopters fly over. These weren't the run of the mill police or television crew size helicopters, I'm talking the Huge, Shake the Building, loud helicopters. The only thing that could top seeing them was in 2008, when we heard about a fighter aircraft fly over for some big wig at Shades of Green. The word was let out to the guests. We spent the whole day looking at the sky. Of course it happened after i had left for the day. (dang Murphy's luck)

Every so often Disney manages to do something that makes me say 'That is Sooo Cool." In 2007 and 2009 in July Magic Kingdom's Mainstreet was the site of a US Citizenship Naturalization Swearing in Ceremony for 1000 new Americans immigrants. "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses . . . and we'll send them to Disney World !!!!"

Talk about going 'to infinity and beyond', in 2008 NASA sent Buzz Lightyeaar to the international spacestation for a several months. The actual doll / action figure flew into space as part of a kids educational program. There were pictures of him standing infront of the crawler as the shuttle was being rolled out to the launch pad. What I find hysterical is that when he was brought back, they had a ticker tape parade down mainstreet complete with Buzz Aldrin. . . the real astronaut.

One more thing about NASA, I was told that when Disney was testing Mission Space, that they had astronauts from the cape come test it. Their assessment was that it was the closest thing to a real shuttle launch a civilian to experience.

Since 2005 Disney World and Disneyland has been home to the Presidential pardoned Thanksgiving Turkeys. The US President pardons them, they are wisked away to the airport and flown, first class mind you, to Florida or Califronia where they are the grand marshals in the holiday parade, then they live out thier days at the park. Although for marshmallow and yam (2005) thiers days ended of natural causes eighteen months later. A little side note to this story: Disney sent them a CD with the song Happiest Place on Earth to them so the turkeys would get acclaimated to it.

When I worked at Epic (indiana jones stunt show)in the ninety's, we were told they were holding the show for a VIP. Fine, we thought, let's get them in here, get the show on the road so we could get to lunch. Well, we waited, and waited and waited. FINALLY, we saw Men in Black walking onto the stage as they escorted an older gentleman to his seat. It was Jimmy Carter and he was surrounded by Secret Service men. Can I just say, Secret Service men are scary. The final scene of the show, Indy fires a pistol. It will only shoot blanks, but the secret service men still watched Indy like a hawk untill the tech locked it up. Jimmy Carter was cool. He came out on atage and shook hands with the cast and crew while his body guards glared at us all.

For the Hall of Presidents efficanados, Yes We Can get the THE real Barack Obama to record the short speach for his animatron's voice. The attraction's creators packed up a small audio studio and went to Washington DC and set up shop in a small at the White House (I think) where Barack recorded his few lines.

Nothing but the best for Our World.